Living a Life Not Chosen
Sometimes, the most profound revelations come from the most unexpected conversations.
Recently, during a trip back home, I reconnected with an old acquaintance whose high status necessitates anonymity.
I havenโt seen them in decades but followed their life journey through common friends.
A highly accomplished professional ranked among the top five most influential people in their industry is respected, has high integrity, and holds immense power and control.
From an onlookerโs observation point, this person has it all: reputation, success, fame, and power.
Yet, in a conversation with close friends, they shared something that stopped me.
I shared about my work with midlife clients and the urgency of acting now to build our next chapter that fits our current priorities and needs.
The acquaintance was quietly listening to our conversation. At some point, they said they had something to say that they had never said out loud, and no one knew about it.
Life Not Chosen
They took a deep breath and said, โI never wanted to enter this profession. I was never even interested in it. I put it down as a second choice in my college application because my parents suggested it. I knew I would never be accepted to study there for political reasons (communist regime).
My passion was in a different field.
I wasnโt accepted for what I wanted to study, but to study this. I cried. I was devastated. Yet, I enrolled and completed the studies. I didnโt want to disappoint anyone.
I wasnโt brave enough to stop.
Every day of my college life was a torture.
I hated my life.
Once I graduated, I entered the industry. What else was I to do? I felt trapped. I rose through the ranks, holding to my values, giving my best.
I am successful, but this is not who I am. This is not how I wanted to spend my life.
Now, at 60+, it is too late to do anything about it. I am only a few years away from retirement.
When I retire, I plan to do something to give me the joy and the personal satisfaction I never had in my career.โ
Your Life
I donโt know about you, but chills go down my back when I think about their experience.
Imagine living your whole adult life doing something you donโt like.
Living a life not chosen.
Now imagine coming to midlife with one last opportunity to change the things that donโt work and choosing not to do it.
Go further, you reach retirement age, and these opportunities are gone.
You are now stuck with it till the end.
How would you feel?
The Choice
I am at the opposite end of the spectrum. I am never afraid to change.
The first steps are always scary, uncomfortable, and stressful.
We leave the familiar and go to a new territory.
I learned through my experiences with change that it is never a mistake.
If you feel something is off, there is a reason for this.
If you consider a change, it indicates that an internal process is taking place.
Donโt brush it off. It is a signal. ๐จ
๐ Examine what is happening. Find out what it is.
A misaligned life brings stress and unhappiness.
Take the step to align your life to your current needs and priorities.
You deserve to be satisfied with your life.
The Questions To Ask Ourselves
Here are a couple of questions to reflect on if the story resonates with you:
- Do you feel stuck or misaligned in your life? What’s holding you back from making a change?
- If you could make a change today without fear of judgment or failure, what would that change be?
- What might be the first step towards embracing change?
I am here for you. Let’s explore how you can achieve that change together and build a better next chapter.
Click on the link in the comment to schedule your free strategy session.
